Wednesday, June 04, 2008

So What Now?

I’ve done a double-nickel and now have to figure out what to do next. An awkward age at best, too young for the senior discount, to old to fool myself into believing I am middle age, unless I am destined to live to 110. I’m not sure I’d want to live that long to be honest, I am not sure why I am still hanging around in the first place. It is time to look back at things I’ve done and I have done a lot, not all pretty, set no records or scaled any mountains, but there is a lot of experience there. It amazes me sometimes to think of all the things I have seen, the events I have had a hand in, the places I have been, all the stuff I know now and all the stuff I am eager to find out about. I susp3ect that is what keeps me going; the curiosity about what comes next.

There is a chunk of metal and wires up on Mars at the present time digging holes in the Martian dirt as I write this. I remember the first leap into space and later the grainy black and white photos sent back of the moon’s surface. As a youngster I toured a computer – it took up an entire two story building and only did payroll and inventory, the same functions the calculator that fits in your shirt pocket can do today. If you were diagnosed with cancer during the time of my childhood, you might as well start digging the hole, now there is a better than average chance you can survive – there is an even better chance detecting the cancer in the first place before it gets so far along no one can help. We’ve all come so far in so many ways, yet have so far to go.

What would I like to do? Go back to school. There are so many interesting things, so much I want to know about I doubt my curiosity will ever be satisfied. I want to study the arts, science, writing, journalism, music, everything and anything I can lay my hands on. I want to be the old coot everyone sees while sitting in the corner of the student union drinking crappy cafeteria coffee, a tall stack of books lying on the table next to me.

But I suppose I will just keep on working to pay for the house, the car, all the practical things that come with trying to live life. Who knows, maybe I will hit the lottery and my next blog will come from that corner in the student union.

23 Comments:

At 6:50 PM, Blogger Carol said...

Are you saying that it's your birthday? Or you just had a birthday? If so, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!

I'm not too far behind you...

I hope that you'll be able to go back to school - or at least take some evening classes. It sounds like fun. Except for the test part.

 
At 8:38 PM, Blogger Keshi said...

'So what now' indeedz!

Keshi.

 
At 9:08 PM, Blogger The Phosgene Kid said...

Carol: Yep, then the 6th of Jun we commemorate D-Day.

As far as the test part - so what, what have you got to lose? You are there to learn what you want, not what some stuffed shirt prof thinks you ought to know...

keshi: something will come to mind eventually.

 
At 10:37 PM, Blogger SJ said...

It's the coffee you are really intrested in isn't it? Admit it.

 
At 4:32 AM, Blogger **¤ ¤** said...

...the coffee, as sj said ..
and oogling young coeds ..
at least that's what the old coot 30 years ago did who sat in the corner of the student union with a stack of paper by his side.
you don't have to be a fulltime student .. you can always take nighttime classes .. or even online classes ..

it's my plan to start working on my doctorate at the age of 70 ... maybe .. or to be a really eccentric old artiste who don't take shit off nobody ..

 
At 5:39 AM, Blogger Jack K. said...

Happy birthday!!!

Remember, age is only a number. Don't spend too much time reminiscing. Continue with the plans for the future. Most importantly, LIVE in the NOW.

 
At 10:45 AM, Blogger The Troll said...

Great post! Perhaps when you're 110 you'll look back and say "I remember when it was very unusual for anyone to be sharp and reasonably healthy at 110".

 
At 11:15 AM, Blogger leelee said...

OMG...Happy Birthday HUGS!!!

 
At 11:31 AM, Blogger /t. said...

birthday?!?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, PHOS!

/t.

 
At 4:10 PM, Blogger Little Lamb said...

Yes, we've seen many changes.

Is it your birthday?

Happy Birthday!

 
At 4:30 PM, Blogger G3T Films said...

The next thing you will see will be fire coming from the mouth of a paper dragon. That's if you come over to the blaaaarg.

It's a nice post Phos! Mind you, I'm a Gen X'er we were to young to see the start of the technological revolution and too old to be completely comfortable with the outcome. Basically, we're a bunch of clueless bastards :) Here's to learning everything we possibly can *cheers*

 
At 6:19 PM, Blogger **¤ ¤** said...

oh, i had meant to add a happy birthday my above comment ..
well, it's not to late..:)
happy birthday!

 
At 7:28 PM, Blogger she said...

happy birthday to the PhoKid. a lovely affirmation of the human spirit. i think school sounds fun - it would be when its strictly for learning - not needing to paper to get a job. oh how i wish something, anything would walk up to that rover on mars.

celebrate!! eat cake!!! and have a cup of coffee ( recommend taking a thermos of the good stuff to school with you)

 
At 8:02 PM, Blogger Chickie said...

Happy Birthday!

For a second, when you said you'd done a double-nickel, I thought that was some sort of slang for winning on a slot machine. Doh!

 
At 10:14 PM, Blogger The Phosgene Kid said...

Thanks all! Great birthday, had a birthday Tamale, best wishes from the greatest folks in the world - you all, and got to spend the day with Mrs. Phos. If that isn't nice, I don't know what is!!

 
At 12:40 AM, Blogger Cherry! said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!

Life is all about adventures and fun times!

xxx

 
At 1:48 AM, Blogger Pink said...

Happy Birthday, Gemini!!!

I know that too old and too young feeling.

Take one course. One won't hurt ;)

xx
pinks

 
At 2:34 AM, Blogger Becky said...

So you're 55 then, I happen to know that you can get all the senior discounts at that age.

 
At 2:46 AM, Blogger How do we know said...

Happy Birthday Phos!! Introspection... that old friend..

 
At 5:46 AM, Blogger Ruela said...

YES,
it's not to late Phos

I'm study the arts
trying to finish studies


Happy Birthday my friend


:)

 
At 5:20 AM, Blogger Eternally Curious said...

Happy belated b'day Phos! Personally, I do think you should go back to school - but as a teacher. Start sharing some of that vast life experience you've amassed.

Oh. And you've no right to continue thinking of me as the kid! (Admit it - you know you have!). My double nickel is in March!

 
At 6:31 PM, Blogger caramaena said...

Happy belated birthday Phos!

 
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