What Ails You??

I was looking for some vitamins and hadn’t been down that aisle in some time. I was amazed at the number of cures that were offered. Everything form increased bust size and increased performance in the bedroom to improved memory and eyesight. There were remedies for problems I didn’t; even know existed; another example of the industry driving the train. The prize for the biggest whore in the vitamin world has to be One-a-day, the vitamin I used to take as a kid. One-a-day panders to every health fad that has come along - weight loss One-a-Day, low-carb One-a-Day, One-a-day limp dick formula, et al. Then there are candy flavored vitamins inviting kids to eat Wilma, and in fact since they’re gummies they have to be harmless! Why not gobble down the entire jar while mom isn’t looking? There are big pills, small pills, lotions, creams, and powders. One doesn’t have to wait for the snake oil salesmen to roll into town with his wagon and smooth patter, everything is right there on the shelf.

If that isn’t enough, TV bombards viewers with the promise of instant weight loss (we couldn’t say it on TV if it wasn’t true), roll-ons to alleviate headaches, “pencil sharpeners” AKA male enhancement products, and lotions that miraculously grow or get rid hair depending. These ads jam the airwaves and fill up our e-mail boxes with promises of a better life, longer lasting erections and multiple orgasms. Remember if you are sporting wood for more than four hours to call a doctor, or Cherry, she’ d like to know.

The fact of the matter is almost without exception even the pills your doctor prescribes don’t cure anything. They merely stave off problems or bring relief for symptoms. The idea is to buy time for your body to heal itself. There is no miracle pill for weight loss, unless you figure in the pounds your wallet or purse will shed in purchasing these products, there isn’t anything that is going to make you irresistible to women or turn you from a hamster dick to a stallion.

All that being said the number of bottles on the shelves and the plethora of products would seem to indicate that someone – lots of someones in fact, are buying into these promises. As bogus as these all are, If anyone does come across something that can actually grow hair or shed pounds while sleeping, please let me know.