Thursday, September 07, 2006

Odds and Ends, but Mostly Odd

M is for Moron

My wife teaches pre-school and this week it was all that and the letter “M”. Consequently she asked parents to bring something to showthe kids that started with the letter M. To my wife’s dismay, one mother brought a bottle of medicine. Sure enough, starts with M. She said “don’t worry, it is empty”, but turned out it wasn’t so her fall back was “it has a child proof cap.” Medicine, good call. Why not bring a Machete, which starts with M and so do Machine gun and Methamphetamine, which I believe the woman was on at the time.

Another silly thing

We have two Public Smoking Ban laws on the ballots this election day. One of them is backed by a cigarette company and is less restrictive then some of the local city bans already in place – imagine that. When you hear that a cigarette company is backing a smoking ban of nay type you can be sure something is rotten. If they really gave a damn about people they’d quit making the cigarettes. The cigarette companies are not your friend – they are trying to kill you. They even admit they are trying to kill you, read the side of the pack.

Phoenix Craziness

There is a push for a street race in Phoenix, much to the chagrin of the Phoenix International Raceway folks who are anxious to keep the race money in their own pockets. The crazy thing is the citizens of Phoenix drive in a street race every day of the week for free just getting to work. The city could make a fortune selling all the speed limit signs to some city where the residents actually give a shit; we sure as hell aren’t getting any use out of them.

Baseline Killer

Our newsies here in Phoenix always act as though there’s a CNN scout in the audience and this time is no different as they tried and convicted some dude the police picked up and have accused of being the Baseline Killer. The Baseline Killer was sharing top billing with the Serial Shooter (may actually be Serial Shooters) here for quite sometime, but they caught the alleged snipers.

Now the guy the police caught may be the Baseline Killer. The composite sketch they had was vague enough any black male would fit the bill. To be sure this guy has some impressive credentials having been in and out of prison for aggravated assault and armed robbery. He may well be the Baseline killer, the police aren’t too forth coming to the public as to what evidence they have so it is hard to say why they have come out and said that he’s the man. The sad thing is the news jackasses here already have the gallows built and aren’t privy to anymore information that the general public. I think they forget they are there to report the news, not make it.

The Tortilla Curtain

Building a wall won’t stop illegal immigration. The Berlin Wall didn’t stop people from escaping into Western Germany and the DMZ doesn’t keep North Koreans out of South Korea. Walls may slow people down, but there are ways around or under in some cases the barriers. I think politicians like the wall concept because it is tangible; “See I am protecting you by building this monument to futility” said the tax bloated senator.

10 Comments:

At 7:31 PM, Blogger jin said...

phos YOU should be the newscaster there.

You deliver these little tidbits with the PERFECT amount of:
Fact
Sarcasm
&
Hilarity

Go phos!!!

 
At 7:59 PM, Anonymous katy said...

Phos you are awesome thanks for taking the time to change your comment preference so I can comment!!!!

Love the news cast. I think wall just make people more determined.

 
At 10:07 PM, Blogger Keshi said...

M for M&Ms - would have been alot easier for the kid lol!

Keshi.

 
At 5:49 AM, Blogger fairscape said...

pk

So it was your hat with the Mickey Mouse ears that I found out in the yard!

One time, years ago, my little brother found stolen dental equipment including syringes out in a field behind our house and took them in for "show and tell" (without mentioning it to my parents). My mother was quite surprised when the teacher called.

I say just make Mexico the 51st state and build the wall down at the bottom. The Mexicans are pretty good at keeping people out of their country from what I've heard.

 
At 7:59 AM, Blogger crallspace said...

Good stuff.. and yes, a wall is a symbol, not a problem solver.

 
At 10:38 AM, Blogger wallycrawler said...

Beter not build that wall , cause in a few years Americans will be jump'n over it to get jobs .

 
At 1:47 PM, Blogger Sarah Letnes said...

I hate when people try to kill me.

 
At 3:22 AM, Blogger Die Muräne said...

M.... well I would bring ME ;)

 
At 11:32 AM, Blogger The Phosgene Kid said...

Jin: Sarcasm? Not me.

Katy: No worries. BTW That’s why they call them BETA – make sure you send that glitch into the fine Google folks. Thanks for stopping by, always a pleasure!

Keshi: Or marshmallows…

FS: My hat!!! It would be nice if we could all get along, but with the folks we empower to rule I don’t think that is going to happen anytime soon.

CS: Thanks. When I was in Korea the Army figured it was only catching about 10% of the folks making it across the DMZ into South Korea, and some of the people making it in were just there to visit relatives.

WC: We’d only take the jobs they didn’t want to do though.

SL: I hate when Stingrays try to kill me!!

DM: Hi! How’s your trip going?

 
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