Monday, May 22, 2006

Bite This!


It is unfortunate that there are those how have apparently spent too much time in Illinois and have become Cheesaphobes. Maligning string cheese, cheddar, swiss, and any other fine upstanding cheese you care to mention. Except the stinky runny nasty goat-shit the French pass off as cheese to the snooty goat shit cheese eaters. Feel free to disrespect that crap on the bottom of a hooker’s shoe cheese anytime you like.

Anyway, a certain FIB has been going on about eating too much cheese, hardly possible as far as I can see. Doctors are always telling you to drink your frikkin’ milk and cheese is made out of milk. Hell, dairy even has its own group, even on the new improved government food pyramid. As far as I am concerned anyone that tells me I eat too much cheese must be a retard.

Anyway I will continue to eat cheese ‘til the cows come home – to make me more frikkin’ cheese. Yeah, it’ll probably make my heart seize up one of these days, but if I can’t have cheese I don’t see much point in being around any way.

So don’t cheese me off and keep your runny damn snot-nose outta my dairy drawer you FIB lookin’ cheese hater!!

Not brought to you by the Dairy Council of Buttslamistan

19 Comments:

At 9:46 PM, Blogger jin said...

LOLOL!!! Is that aimed at all FIB's or did you have any particular ones in mind?

Did you read this about seb yet?
http://randomramblingsofmine.blogspot.com/2006/05/sebastian-carroll-for-prime-minister.html
Funny stuff!
:-)

 
At 9:49 PM, Blogger jin said...

Oh, DUH...I went back & saw it is a certain individual...but who that is remains a mystery...unless they comment! LOL

 
At 12:37 AM, Blogger Cherry! said...

I'm all for eating cheese and lots of it! When I'm scoffing down the tenth kilo for the day I pretend I'm on the Aitkens diet where you are allowed to eat cheese and prosciutto and salami and all that good stuff.

A heart attack on a plate is my kind of meal!

 
At 8:07 AM, Blogger The Phoenix said...

I love cheese!

Just don't cut it while inside a hot car with the windows up.

 
At 9:28 AM, Blogger Sarah Letnes said...

I did not malign cheese! I just suggested that maybe some people are eating a little too much cheese. The comment was not an attack on all that is good and glorious about Wisconsin and the cheese they produce.

"All I said…was, "That piece of halibut was good enough for Jehovah.""
--Monty Python's Life of Brian

 
At 10:42 AM, Blogger The Phosgene Kid said...

JIN: I never pass up a chance to dis FIBS or French "cheese".

 
At 10:46 AM, Blogger The Phosgene Kid said...

Cherry:

Yeah, Italian Cheese is pretty good. Italy is another one of those countries where you can eat damn near everything, so to speak, and it is all good.

Phoenix: Letting one go in a closed up car is actually pretty damn funny.

SL: Illinois Cheese Hater!!

 
At 10:59 AM, Blogger fairscape said...

I owe my life to cheese.

 
At 11:29 AM, Blogger Sarah Letnes said...

Plllllb!

 
At 11:35 AM, Blogger Dirk the Feeble said...

I don't think "disrespect" is a verb.

 
At 11:58 AM, Blogger Stud said...

and your grammar isn't the best:)

 
At 2:35 PM, Blogger The Phosgene Kid said...

Grammar gestapo please follow Mr. Cheese's advice...

 
At 3:02 PM, Blogger Sarah Letnes said...

Mr. Cheese looks like he would be good friends with Mr. Hanky.

 
At 4:15 PM, Blogger The Phosgene Kid said...

I am thinking about a series featuring Mr. Cheese kicking Illinois' butt - what do you think?? I may even introduce Mrs. Cheese and the little curds..

 
At 5:35 PM, Blogger Eternally Curious said...

"little curds" .... roflmao!!
Why yes ... I am easily entertained!

 
At 7:27 PM, Blogger Keshi said...

The FBI is cheesy u know - Just dun mind em...;-)

Keshi.

 
At 12:47 AM, Blogger The Phosgene Kid said...

The FBI is cheesy, but Fucking Illinois Bastards AKA FIBs are definetly not..

 
At 12:56 AM, Blogger Tea and Books, etc said...

ROTFLMAO!!

 
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