Here comes Santa Claus

Been busy checking the naughty/nice list -- well mostly the naughty list as it's the longest. That's ok with me, less toys to make and I have a huge pile of coal up here. The eleves like the time off, they are inherintly lazy creatures, and a bout as smart as a bucket full or rien deer droppings. I have plenty of those too, the hay I feed them doesn't make too many stops in a typical deer digestive system I'll tell you. Whoever thought up the phrase "like shit through a goose" never met a reindeer. And don;t get me started on deer flatulence - the Northern lights aren't a cosmic phenomena, just deer gas being ignited in the atmosphere. Fortunately there is an upside, deer farts mask the smell of the elves. Those little idiots never heard of soap and water, in liquid form, is hard to come by in these parts.

Anyway, I am looking forward to visiting your house, and if I don't leave anything under the tree, check your roof, because the reindeer certainly lefty you a little something.