Don't wreck your grill

I was horrified to read an item by a Canadian woman about grilling vegetables on her new grill. Apparently Canadian men haven't read the rules regarding grilling or her husband would realize the biggest rookie mistake of all is letting your wife near the grill in the first place. The second is allowing vegetative matter to taint the finely tuned meat cooker that is your grill. The grill is an altar of the meat god, and nothing pisses him off quicker than someone polluting his domain with some fru-fru veggie concoction. Laugh if you will, go ahead and slap that squash on your grill, but don't come crying when all that comes off the grill ever after is burned up hot-dogs. The meat god don't play, my man.

So man up, point the wifey back towards the kitchen where she can steam spinach all the livelong day and then slap a cowboy cut steak on grid -- send the smoke skyward in praise of the meat god and you'll never have a grilling "situation." This is your turf, bad enough all the stuff from your college days has been relegated to the garage this grill is your one space where you have control. Or you can hand in your balls, forget the secret man-handshake and let your wife defile the grill with (shudder) singed lettuce leaves and retreat back into the garage looking through the boxes that contain what was once your life and pine for your manhood. Just saying...